It’s a rainy day in the desert, an experience made all the more beautiful by its rarity. And I’m having trouble focusing my thoughts to settle on one topic for this blog. These past couple weeks I’ve felt – SCATTERED.
My mind, like a butterfly, flits from thing to thing, alighting on one only for a moment before winding its way to the next. Laundry, school shootings, dream tattoo designs, my data entry job, taxes, blogging, book club, my tutoring job, the windshield wipers on my car, some necessary correspondence I keep putting off, my librarian job, Russian hackers, feeding the dog, the current state of Biblical Counseling, the Agatha Christie book I’m trying to finish, civilian lives in Syria, my new church, plans for spring break in a few weeks, Trump’s ceaseless tweets, doctor’s appointments, prayers for friends, doggy snuggles, conversations with mum, that poem I heard two days ago, gun control in relation to suicide & domestic violence, texts from friends, the gorgeous grey clouds outside my guest room office window . . . an endless stream of thoughts.
How do I UN-SCATTER? Is that even possible in modern American life?
I’ve listened to two different blogs about rest, honoring a Sabbath, and they have been filled with great ideas. Yet my mind has already added their suggestions to my infinite to-do list.
Often, when I feel this way, I just want to hibernate. Not face reality. Curl up in bed in cozy pjs, with a nice cuppa tea and a good book. Instead of doing that, today I am tackling that to-do list one entry at a time using my 2-highlighter system of prioritization. Blogging was in pink, so here I am trying not to half-ass it too badly. I already did my laundry and finished my latest invoice for one of my jobs, texted a couple friends, looked out the window, and snuggled the dog, so stuff’s getting done.
Next up – a cup of tea and taxes.
How do you un-scatter?
It takes a little while of consistent practice before it really kicks in, but I’ve found mindfulness meditation–using Headspace, at first, though once I understood it, I could do it on my own–pretty useful at taming the monkey mind. It helps both long term, making these scattered times less common, and short term, helping to calm the chaos when they do turn up.
I have a coworker who has gotten into mindfulness meditation and has been helped significantly through it. I honestly don’t know much about it.
The aforementioned app, which probably got me banished to spam purgatory, gives a free 10-day trial, 10 minutes a day. It includes a handful of short videos to explain the theory behind it. You might check it out.
I didn’t notice any changes myself, really, until out of the blue a handful of people commented on how calm I was under fairly stressful conditions. Kind of gratifying.
I’ll look into it! Thanks for the suggestion.
Psalm 91:1”He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty” calms me.
Always comforting. Thank you.